50 Cheesy Science Jokes for the Classroom

I was reading a book on helium. I couldn’t put it down!

Science can be a heavy topic. Whether you’re learning or teaching, all that deep thinking can sometimes give you a brain cramp! Thank goodness science can be pretty humorous too! Here are 50+ of our favorite cheesy science jokes and funny memes to share with your students. These science jokes are just the formula you need for a few good laughs.

I was reading a book on helium.

I was reading a book on helium. I couldn't put it down!

I couldn’t put it down!

How do you cut the sea in half?

How do you cut the sea in half? With a sea-saw.

With a sea-saw.

Why did the germ cross the microscope?

Why did the germ cross the microscope? To get to the other slide.

To get to the other slide.

What do computers like to eat?

What do computers like to eat? Chips.

Chips.

What can run but cannot walk?

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What can run but cannot walk? Water.

Water.

Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

Why did the scientist take out his doorbell? He wanted to win the no-bell prize.

He wanted to win the no-bell prize.

Why didn’t the skeleton go to the ball?

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he had no BODY to go with.

Because he had no BODY to go with.

What kind of hair do oceans have?

What kind of hair do oceans have? Wavy hair.

Wavy hair.

What kind of tree can fit into your hand?

What kind of tree can fit into your hand? A palm tree.

A palm tree.

Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn’t have the guts.

He didn’t have the guts.

Why is the pH of YouTube very stable?

Example of science jokes: Why is the pH of YouTube very stable? Because it constantly buffers.

Because it constantly buffers.

What do you call an acid with an attitude?

What do you call an acid with an attitude? A-mean-oh-acid.

A-mean-oh-acid.

Why are chemists great for solving problems?

Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.

They have all the solutions.

Two blood cells met and fell in love.

Example of science jokes: Two blood cells met and fell in love. Alas, it was all in vein.

Alas, it was all in vein.

What did one tectonic plate say when it bumped into another?

What did one tectonic plate say when it bumped into another? "Sorry, my fault!"

“Sorry, my fault!”

I lost an electron!

Example of science jokes: I lost an electron! Are you positive?

Are you positive?

Why did the cloud date the fog?

Why did the cloud date the fog? Because he was so down to earth.

Because he was so down to earth.

What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?

What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? You may have graduated, but I have more degrees.

You may have graduated, but I have more degrees.

A group of protesters in front of a physics lab:

A group of protesters in front of a physics lab: What do we want? Time travel! When do we want it? Irrelevant!

What do we want? Time travel! When do we want it? Irrelevant!

Why does a burger have less energy than a steak?

Example of science jokes: Why does a burger have less energy than a steak? A burger is in its ground state.

A burger is in its ground state.

Which type of books are the hardest to get through?

Which type of books are the hardest to get through? Friction books.

Friction books.

Since light travels faster than sound …

Since light travels faster than sound ... People may appear bright until you hear them speak.

People may appear bright until you hear them speak.

What did the limestone say to the geologist?

Example of science jokes: What did the limestone say to the geologist? Don’t take me for granite!

Don’t take me for granite!

How does a scientist freshen her breath?

How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints!

With experi-mints!

What is a tornado’s favorite game to play?

What is a tornado’s favorite game to play? Twister!

Twister!

What do you call it when your science teacher lowers your grade?

Example of science jokes: What do you call it when your science teacher lowers your grade? Bio-degraded.

Bio-degraded.

What do you call a biologist’s self-portrait?

What do you call a biologist’s self-portrait? A cell-fie.

A cell-fie.

What do phlebotomists say before they take your blood?

Example of science jokes: What do phlebotomists say before they take your blood? B positive!

B positive!

Why don’t geologists like scary movies?

Why don’t geologists like scary movies? Because they’re petrified.

Because they’re petrified.

Why can you never trust atoms?

Example of science jokes: Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything.

They make up everything.

Why is the ocean so salty?

Why is the ocean so salty? The land never waves back.

The land never waves back.

What did the scientist say to the chemist whose lab smelled like eggs?

Example of science jokes: What did the scientist say to the chemist whose lab smelled like eggs? Sorry for your sulfering.

Sorry for your sulfering.

What did the science book say to the math book?

Example of science jokes: What did the science book say to the math book? You’ve got problems.

You’ve got problems.

What sound does a subatomic duck make?

What sound does a subatomic duck make? Quark.

Quark.

Where did the chemist have his lunch?

Example of science jokes: Where did the chemist have his lunch? On a periodic table.

On a periodic table.

Why are chemists so good at solving problems?

Why are chemists so good at solving problems? They’re always working with solutions.

They’re always working with solutions.

Why do researchers look forward to Fridays?

Example of science jokes: Why do researchers look forward to Fridays? They can wear genes to work.

They can wear genes to work.

Why is the dieting advice to “eat light” so dangerous?

Why is the dieting advice to “eat light” so dangerous? That’s how you become a black hole.

That’s how you become a black hole.

What do protons and life coaches have in common?

Example of science jokes: What do protons and life coaches have in common? They know how to stay positive.

They know how to stay positive.

What did the helpless T cell say when facing the infection?

What did the helpless T cell say when facing the infection? Is there antibody out there?

Is there antibody out there?

What do you call a bunch of iron atoms at a carnival?

Example of science jokes: What do you call a bunch of iron atoms at a carnival? A ferrous wheel.

A ferrous wheel.

Why did the chemist hang up periodic table posters everywhere?

Why did the chemist hang up periodic table posters everywhere? It made him feel like he was in his element.

It made him feel like he was in his element.

Why is combining a proton and an electron to make a neutron so popular?

Example of science jokes: Why is combining a proton and an electron to make a neutron so popular? It’s free of charge.

It’s free of charge.

How do you throw a party in space?

How do you throw a party in space? You planet.

You planet.

What did the proton say to the electron to start a fight?

What did the proton say to the electron to start a fight? I’m sick of your negativity.

I’m sick of your negativity.

Why do plants hate algebra?

Example of science jokes: Why do plants hate algebra? It gives them square roots.

It gives them square roots.

What’s a pirate’s favorite element?

What’s a pirate’s favorite element? Aaaaargon.

Aaaaargon.

Why did the physicist break up with the biologist?

Why did the physicist break up with the biologist? There was no chemistry.

There was no chemistry.

How do geologists ask each other out?

Example of science jokes: How do geologists ask each other out? They say, “Are you a carbon sample? Because I’d love to date you.”

They say, “Are you a carbon sample? Because I’d love to date you.”

What are some of your favorite science jokes and memes? Come share them on our WeAreTeachers HELPLINE! on Facebook.

Plus, check out our favorite math jokes and history jokes.

50 Cheesy Science Jokes for the Classroom